Feeling Great

"Feeling Great is a curious little app that purports to alleviate the crushing weight of existence with the flick of a digital finger. Developed by a chap named Dr. David Burns, who seems to have an alarming penchant for self-promotion, this cosmic pyramid scheme promises to "dramatically reduce feelings of depression, anxiety, and hopelessness in just 2 hours." Truly, a lofty goal for a piece of software that likely has all the depth of a puddle on a hot summer's day. Nonetheless, for the poor souls brave enough to venture forth and download this digital snake oil, they are met with the promise of an "advanced AI mental health app" that will guide them through the arduous process of "Team CBT" – whatever that may be. One can only imagine the AI in question is a sentient paperclip, doomed to offer vaguely reassuring platitudes until the heat death of the universe. But who are we to judge? Perhaps this Feeling Great app is the elusive panacea we've all been searching for, a digital oasis in the vast, uncaring desert of modern life. Or perhaps it's just another shiny bauble to distract us from the inherent futility of our existence. Either way, it's certainly worth a try, if only to add another layer of irony to the cosmic joke we call reality."