HeHealth

"HeHealth, the digital equivalent of a cosmic pyramid scheme, is a curious little contraption that aims to address the "global silent epidemic" of sexual health woes. Developed by a team of physicians and AI scientists, it promises to deliver confidential, timely advice to those struggling to access help - a laudable goal, to be sure, but one that reeks of the same optimistic naivety that led to the creation of the wheel, the internet, and other such "innovations" that have only served to complicate the lives of the hapless denizens of this wretched planet. Alas, the idea that one can simply plug their, er, "issues" into a machine and receive sage counsel is about as practical as expecting a bowl of petunias to solve all of one's problems. But, if you're the sort who revels in the existential despair of the modern condition, and finds solace in the knowledge that no matter how advanced our technology becomes, we are ultimately helpless specks in the great void, then by all means, give HeHealth a try. Who knows, it might even provide a momentary distraction from the impending doom that awaits us all."